So then i decided to abandoned this blog again. I know, i'm sorry plus no ones give a shit anyway.
Woke up at 6 Am and i think i'll have a better day by listening my favourite indie pop music on my playlist, but No! Things are getting heavier right after i step on my office. The lazy thoughts works perfectly with my tired body and thinking about how i'm gonna spend 8hrs doing something that really stress me out, is killing me.
And there's nothing more frustrating than faking a smiles everyday with some annoying co-workers who also hate doing the job.
I try to get some help with a cup of coffee but too bad i'm not really get along with cafeine it makes my heart beat fast and i thought i was gonna die. So, Nope.
and what the worst is i have to do that everyday, because it's my job, though its really drives me crazy but i do really need this job to pay the bills. Sometimes at works when i do everything perfectly fine and good and neat and well, i sit and started to think about how i love being alone and writing stuff. I never done a really good writing, i just love doing it. It helps me to keep myself sane and normal.
When it comes to a silent night , i can hear all the thoughts in my head screaming. maybe i'm crazy, maybe i'm not. i don't know. i barely know myself lately. I feel numb towards everything.
And the most important is, i feel so far away from God. What is wrong with me, God? i never meant to leave you, i try to fight all demons inside me. Don't leave me God,i need your help.
