A few months ago i was in a miserable days where i struggle each day just to keep breathing and feeling okay about myself.
I hate everything almost everyday in my daily basis. Maybe because i
just getting a lot of sick from people being mean and cruel around me.
Like an abandon house i was so miserable, cold and dark. I almost give
up on life like a part of my body wants me to quit, but my brain told me
"NO! Don't give up, there's gotta be something good happen for you,
just hang in there a little bit longer and see!"
So I follow what my brain said. It turns out to be a great decisions and
the best one that i ever made in my life. Because, Why would i wanna
spend more time to be sad and anxious. Live the life you have,because
when you're dead, all you got left in this world is memories for the
people you leave behind, so make it worth.
All my so called friends left me, SO WHAT? If they are a good friends,
they will took an effort to fix everything, not leave. And I thank God
because i finally can see their true colours. If they don't wanna took a
place in my life, they certainly don't deserve my time. So i'm gladly
to know that the bad vibes finally taking out from my life, to keep me
going and stand still. It's my life, not them so screw them all!
My boss are horrible sometimes, but yet he saw a good potential in me so
that makes him a good one. Like, giving me a chance to be better me.
And boss are always horrible anyway, but yeah, i'm happy with what i'm
doing right now, got the job, got a new stage in life and finally woke
up not feeling anxious. I'm good with that.
Yes, life could be pretty difficult sometimes, life can torn your soul
apart, life can makes you scared and confused. But that doesn't mean you
have to give up on what you hold this whole times, I still got the
chance to do the things i love, I got my lovely family near me, a lovely
boyfriend who willing to do anything for me, so i'm grateful. We should
be grateful, correct me if i'm wrong.
Depression could somehow bring me to the lowest point in life, but i
keep trying to searching that light, that can help me to go through the
darkness point in my life, i will never stop.
From now on, i'll forgive and forget to all those friends who ever came
into my life , shared their memories and then just leave me without a
warn. i forgive them all and also i'll forget them, cut them from my
memories queue because i don't wanna keep the negative and bad thoughts
about how hurt i am , about how they crushes my heart. So i proud to
myself that i can finally say "Goodbye my old pals, may the odd be ever
in your favor. Don't come to find my shoulder anymore, because i promise
to myself that i would never ever ever ever forever be the one who's
gonna be there again when you down. I'm done being used by you!"
Ah, life is good isn't it. You can see the clouds moving on the bright
blue sky in the midday, feel the wind on your hair, and just do whatever
you want as long as you're not giving up.
That's an infinite happiness.
Stay awesome,
Ai
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